The Painful Truth About The Worldwide Church of God
" Stairway to Mammon "
Sung to the tune of Led Zeppelin's incredible 20th century classic
 " Stairway to Heaven "
By Grizzly

There's an apostle that's sure

All that glitters is gold

And we bought him a stairway to mammon

When we toured Ambassador , lo !

The Auditorium was closed

To the saps like us by which it was paid for

 

We signed away all

Our pay in tithes to be sure

That all H.W.'s words had two meanings

In our fees that he took

And our wallets he'd wring

Sometimes all of our pay to him given

 

There's a feeling I get

When I look to the west

And I cry as I see my cash leaving

All his thoughts we now see

Were rings of smoke blowing free

From the ass of that deceiver proceeding

 

In his moneyraking boon

Herbert W. called the tune

 " To my Church donate all , beyond reason "

And a new day did dawn

On the Campus so long

And the money-tills echoed with clinking

 

Oooh , why didn't it make us wonder ?

There was a bustle at the College

As Herbert Armstrong

Did a major pitch for money to glean

He said " There's two paths you can go by " , but in the long run

Fleecing his flock sure was the road he's on

 

His accountants humming " what a cash flow ! "

And we did not know

As Armstrong called on us to join him

We could not see his blowhard wind blow

And did you know

Our money vanished on the whispering wind

 

And as we wound on down life's road

To Armstrong's bull we sold our souls

There walks a Savior we all know

Who shone TRUE light and wants to show

How life does not need to be sold

 

And if you listen very hard

Christ will come to you at last

Where one can build one's humble soul

On Christ's firm Rock , not Herbert's gold

Armstrong conned us....a stairway to mammon .

 


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