AW scrapes into top half million

It may be a blip, and Alexa rankings are based on a limited sample (there's no absolute way to rank the countless web sites and blogs that pop in and out of existence), but today AW has nudged its way across the half million threshold to stand at 496,251. I might go crazy and break open a can of Diet Coke...

So here is the list of COG-related sites that constitute the shakers and movers, and in whose august company AW is honored to abide... if but for a short while... as a lonely critical voice.

1. UCG's Good News flagship: 80,884
2. Ronnie Weinland's the-end.com: 82,722
3. Gerry's Trumpet: 94,877
4. Alan Ruth's BS... meaning Bible Study: 117,254
5. UCG's official site: 126,262
6. Ritenbubba's Bible Tools: 150,088
7. Packatollah Dave's RCG: 159,740
8. Bob Thiel's spiel: 161,818
9. David Hulme's (COG-aic) Vision: 179,158
10. Spanky's monthly - Tomorrow Swirled: 185,013
11. Joe Jr.'s WCG: 191,584
12. David Sielaff/Ernie Martin (ASK): 347,678
13. Ritenbaugh's CGG: 358,709
14. Kubik: 412,565
15. The Living Church of Rod: 439,568
16. Gerry's PCG cult site: 464,429
17. AW: 496,521

Meanwhile renovations have been completed on our new World Headquarters building south of Auckland. As a gesture of goodwill I'm prepared to offer Greg Albrecht a swap of facilities (with PTM languishing at 504,999).

Only the set has changed

On Thursday, February 26, Dr. Meredith and Mr. Ames each taped a new Tomorrow's World telecast on the new set, in our new studio building two doors down from the main Headquarters facility. Our thanks go out to all the brethren who prayed for God's blessing on the acquisition and renovation of the new building, and the design and implementation of the new set. (LCG media spin)

The gerontocracy that rules LCG has a swish new TV set at its disposal. There are two versions, one for Dick Ames (who is still able to stand) and one for Rod, who now needs to be wired into an upright position behind a desk.

But while Rod may be only too happy to slap around his audience with a state-of-the-art backdrop, what he is actually saying is likely to be nothing more than warmed-up left-overs from as far back as the 1950s, as is clearly demonstrated in a recent post on Living Armstrongism. It seems poor old Rod hasn't had an original thought - and few original words - in decades. Talk about "holding fast"!

But TV sets are another matter. Image is everything, and the Presiding Evangelist certainly learned from a highly competent ad man.

The measure of any one of us as a mature, growing human being, is our capacity to change and adapt, to extend our vision and horizons. To be thinking the very same thoughts as one did thirty (or fifty!) years ago is a confession that very little cranial activity is taking place.

But no mind, it is a very attractive set...

Occluded Vision

Meanwhile, in the pocket universe known as COG-aic...

Dilettante-in-Chief David Hulme has come close to rattling his begging bowl.

At Vision, we are pursuing excellence in publishing in print and on the Web... We hope you agree and that you will consider supporting in whatever way you can this very necessary work.

Yes, times are tough. Send money quick or Dave might have to fly economy class.

Also of some interest, given the recent discussion on evolution, is a Vision review of Michael Dowd's book Thank God for Evolution.Reviewer Dan Cloer unleashes a torrent of scorn. I haven't read Dowd, but he seems to mesh with a number of theologians who follow in the wake of Teilhard de Chardin, the early twentieth-century Jesuit scholar. For those who have encountered Australian Michael Morwood's "new story" theology, Dowd's approach will also be familiar, but in an Americanized, Protestantized version, seeking to make sense of God and Christian belief in a world very different from the "heaven above, hades below" cosmology of the ancient world.

Cloer comments: "Every page is replete with jammed-together science factoids and out-of-context Bible catchphrases."

Sounds like the Good News style manual to me...

"Intellectualism runs rampant."

Oh no... please... stop... mercy... not intellectualism...

Actually, Dowd seems reasonably approachable, based on sample pages you can access on Amazon. Now if Dan would really like a challenge, and risk shattering his delicate crypto-creationist worldview forever, I'd happily recommend John Haught.

You can find the digital edition of Vision online.

Ron the Cheshire Cat

Alas, the Work of the LORD has been thwarted. His Messenger, Ronald Weinland, is finally fading - like the proverbial smile on the Cheshire Cat - from public interest. Ron's website has been overtaken in the Alexa ratings by the Good News website, and the popularity of his COG-PKG website is sinking rapidly.

How can this be, gentle reader? The Two Witnesses can't be allowed to flunk, can they?

Oh well, it was quite a buzz while it lasted Ron, and you and your lovely wife Laura have provided us all with a lot of laughs. Now that the curious onlookers are moving away, the core membe... suckership will also start shedding. Tithes will take a nosedive, the jet-setting lifestyle along with it.

Oh dear, how sad, never mind.

Born to Lose?

Born to Win, the online presence of former WCG/CGI and now independent evangelist Ron Dart (www.borntowin.net), has disappeared from the web. Try clicking over to the Great Man's personal site (www.rondart.com) and you'll be stopped by the Internet Gestapo demanding a username and password - huh? I mean, why bother? (Update: the password protection was removed a short while after this posting appeared. The last entry - right wing political drivel - is dated Feb. 6. Born to Win is still MIA at this moment in time.)

The disappearance of Dart is probably a temporary situation, but maybe not. (Update 2: Ron is back, phew!) Regardless, a COGiverse without Ron's dulcet tones (in distinction to the relentless whine of Meredith) is barely imaginable. Dart was regarded by many as a better speaker than even the golden-tongued Garner Ted Armstrong. Whether the impressive preaching form is matched by actual substance is, naturally, a somewhat different question.

Evolved we have

It's kind of sad how what was meant to be a humorous post, featuring a morphed photograph of William Dankenbring, can bring the creationism advocates out of the woodwork. As far as I'm concerned, there is no debate. Evolved we have, as Yoda might say.

Most Christians would agree. Catholics and mainline Protestants long ago decided to front up to the inevitable. We don't read the Bible to learn about science, and we don't need to believe six impossible things before breakfast each day. We read the Bible to engage in an ongoing adventure that holds a mirror up to reality, that challenges us to live justly, that directs us to realign our lives with the Good Spirit, that enables us to become authentic, free and compassionate people. If reading the Bible doesn't do that, then we're probably better off not reading it at all. The kingdom of God isn't just some future pie in the sky hope, it's supposed to erupt in our midst and spill over as a blessing for those around us.

Which is why so much that goes on in the small sectarian communities that make up the Armstrong diaspora is unhealthy. If we read the Bible to fuel our "prophetic" conjectures, if we read the Bible to discover "new truth" that will make us special and better than other people, then we've exchanged the bread of life for junk food.

The Missing Link

The Darwin anniversary is too good an opportunity to miss a bit of borax poking, as the Aussie expression goes. So for the edification of AW readers here is a prime example of Homo habilis. This fine fellow was morphed courtesy of the British Open University site, where you can upload a photo of yourself (or a dear friend, perhaps) and see what a handsome chap (or beautiful chapette) you or they would have made back when Adam was a boy.

Pictured is a latter-day Homo habilis (meaning 'handyman'), a creator of stone tools who lived in Africa 2.2 - 1.6 million years ago. This particular specimen, however, is very much alive and kicking, and has made a monkey of himself many times.

Additional clue: appropriately, he's the author of a book on creationism!

The Art of Foolish Preaching

by Dennis Diehl

I’ve heard a lot of foolish preaching in my time. Bathsheba was named so because David lusted after her while she was taking a bath. A man was found days after being swallowed (200 year old urban legend). Scientists have found missing time in the universe and it must be because Joshua stopped the earth from rotating for about a day to kill more of Israel’s enemies, and so on. The examples of foolish stories given to illustrate the mythologies of the Bible are endless.

In the COG ministry, those most given to foolish preaching tend to give the longest sermons on the most speculative of topics. Rambling is raised to an art form.

But there is a style of preaching that beats them all. Ron Weinland, the dominant half of the Two Witnesses spoken of by John the Divine, or at least John on Drugs, in the book of Revelation, has a style that works very well to keep the human mind's unconscious marginally informed by the foolishness of preaching.

Let’s notice how this kind of preaching programs the mind. There is no real content in this style. There is no real theology, no historical understanding or truth of any matter for the most part. It is meme (mind virus) stimulation misusing the Bible as the feed and the member as the fodder.

Let’s take a look at the example of foolish preaching from a recent sermon.

After noting that he will be speaking in upcoming weeks in Detroit, he says that he will confine his Church visits to the South and won’t be traveling north in winter due to unpredictable traveling weather. Detroit? If I had been a teen in that audience, I’d have busted up. It’s February. Who moved Detroit?

“Sometimes we may expect big things to happen…but that’s not how it works.” This implies he knows just how it really works when he has no clue how it works.

“All of these are thunders…the worst drought in 50 years.” Why do we fail to ask, “Well, 50 years ago must have been a Thunder that pooped out.” Kinda like today being the hottest day since 1921. Well, it got hot then so what’s the big deal?

“New people can go to the interviews and that can be a stumbling block to some..” Ya think?

“There are questions that can be EASILY answered.” Not really. One can give easy answers but easy and correct are not the same thing.

“We are the only true Church that is God’s.” No comment

“..how God is leading his Church and me as his end time prophet.” And you know this?

“As I teach, and lead and guide the church….we yield.” Well except that part about if found false anything less than quitting preaching is insane.

“That was inspiring and exciting..” This spoken in light of God not allowing Ron to give a sermon on Trumpets that would prove not to be true.

“People came to understand and see…the vast majority did.” Are you sure?

“This is exciting… all stated in these interviews concerning these time lines ...does not in any matter take away from my role as end time prophet... I hope we understand that.” Uh huh

“It’s not our choice.” No Ron, it is our choice. Life is choices.

“Do you know what God’s purpose in doing that was? These trials serve to bring to the surface impurities.” And you know this? Maybe they bring foolishness to the surface.

“There are sins in people’s lives that they are not addressing as they should be. ...you cannot receive more that God has for us.” You know, blame the member for questioning sermon content and accuracy.

“God has given one year, 2008, as a type of the past 6000 years.” Uh huh

“The 50th truth did change the all the major timing in the interviews.” Phew! Close call there on me being a false prophet.

“It would be wise for you to listen…” Or not…

“No one contacted me back. They don’t want to go into this.” Yes they do.

“What became clear was that he wanted me to declare myself a false prophet…nothing happened.” How unreasonable.

“Why go into explaining anything to them…they don’t even keep the Sabbath.” Doh! What were we thinking!

“They can’t handle the truth.” Either can you.

“There is no need to have anymore..” (interviews) Yes there is.

We get the point. This style of preaching simply reminds people of how they are to think. It is liberally sprinkled with “God wants us to know.” “It is obvious to us as God’s people.” “You have to have the Spirit of God to even begin to understand what has happened.” “I think we all understand this even if others don’t.” “We know…” and many other such phrases that make the audience feel either special or at least unwilling to wonder why they don’t feel this way.

It is mind virus contagion at its best and worst. It does make people sick and they do spread the infection to others until it runs its course.

It’s one style of foolish preaching. Any others that come to mind?

Web Witnesses

The Internet trends bring both good news and bad to COG ministries in the latest Alexa update. Dropping out of the top million listings on the Web are World News & Prophecy (UCG), and the LCG member-site (cogl.org). Overall, however, traffic is on the rise. Here are the COG high-flyers. The number denotes which thousand band each site sits in, so at 503, AW is actually ranked at 503,198 - close enough to LCG to breathe down the neck of Roderick the Unready (503,176).

1. Still sitting in the top spot is Ronnie Weinland's the-end.com. The court jester always pulls an audience! 76
2. The UCG's stately galleon, The Good News. 79
3. Fresh off the Oklahoma compound in Edmond, the Trumpet. Were those helicopters flying overhead black? 99
4. Can you clip your toenails on the Sabbath and still be a true Christian? Ask Alan Ruth at biblestudy.org. 124
5. The first of the official church websites, up 10,000 on last time, UCG. 130
6. Keeping up appearances - with David Hulme rather than Hyacinth Bouquet - Vision. 146
7. Packatollah Dave hangs in there for the RCG. 153
8. None other than the double-doc, Bob Thiel, sailing out way in front of any official LCG site. 161
9. Here's a church site from Charlotte, NC. Nope, nothing to do with LCG, Bible Tools is the work of the Ritenbaugh CGG. 166
10. Spluttering in at number 10, the Tkach sectlet, which may or may not be called WCG if the Glendora GICks get their way... 178
11. Tomorrow's World finally puts one on the board for Rod "Spanky" Meredith of the LCG. 192
12. Ernie Martin may be long gone, but his nephesh goes marching on (metaphorically of course) in the guise of David Sielaff's ASK. 330
13. The Ritenbaugh church site, cgg.org. 383
14. I once described Vic Kubik's indepedent UCG site as Kubikistan, which was uncharitable. Vic punches with the heavyweights. 392
15. A flurry of applause for Gerry! PCG's official site drags the chain to accompanying moans. 497
16. The true Philadelphian (but not Flurridian) Work of God - LCG's official church site. Is that a cry of Hosanna from Bob? 503
17. Yes, well, there's always one black sheep... Ambassador Watch cuddles up to the Rodomite edifice. 503
18. And hot on our heels, throwing money hither and yon on spiffy design, it's Greg ("I'm no legalist") Albrecht at PTM. 508
19. UCG's Beyond Today chugs in. 586
20. Pass the wieners and ketchup, Ronnie's PKG takes a bow. 587
21. Ron Dart's Born To Win takes a dive. 705
22. Fred Coulter (CBCG) gains a little extra traction. 802
23. Don Billingsley's Faithful Flock also make a small gain. 830

Flying Free in print

John Morgan's Flying Free is now available in large soft-cover format. Here's an edited version of two earlier posts on AW about the first edition (which was only released on CD ROM.)

John Morgan is a member of the Kiwi diaspora living in the Big, Dry Country, west of Eden. He is also a former member of the Worldwide Church of God.

He’s the latest to put his story in book form, but unlike some others he doesn't appear to have a sectarian axe to grind. He’s put together a valuable resource.

Here’s a brief excerpt from the preface:

“I believe that to be successful in completely moving on ... it is important to understand more about Herbert Armstrong – answering critical questions like: what was his background, and where was he coming from? It is important to understand the actual reality of the organisation WCG members were a part of. ...

“In Flying Free I have addressed these issues. This book contains never previously published research on Herbert Armstrong’s Holiness Quaker upbringing. It includes extensive research on the WCG’s comparison to a cult, and the characteristics that actually define a cult. There are also many pages devoted to scanned material from original WCG literature – the content of material read from an external perspective, is assimilated and interpreted completely differently to the identical documents read from within the organisation. Reviewing this material can give new insight into the journey taken by WCG members and ex-members.

“Further to this, Flying Free also contains an open-minded assessment of the origins of the Bible, the authority of the Bible, and an appraisal of organised Christianity’s influence on the individual Christian.

“Flying Free documents the impact of the Armstrong teachings on individual lives, but then goes on to show a priceless freedom – found in life beyond fundamentalism.

“Flying Free should serve as a warning to those contemplating entering a fundamentalist church.”

I've read quite a few books by ex-WCG members. Some of them have been shattering (Herbert Armstrong's Tangled Web springs first to mind) while others have been facile. In recent years I've reviewed – favourably – Pam Dewey's Field Guide (an excellent primer on American religions), Dennis Embo's The God that Prevailed (a testimony by an ex-member who converted to Catholicism), and Henry Sturcke's Encountering the Rest of God (a theological dissertation.) Good people, good books.

Then there are the less worthy tomes. These are filed away in box where I can blissfully ignore them, side by side with ancient “literature” sanctioned by the church.

Flying Free is in a category of its own. I can honestly say my expectations were exceeded. In fact I've read nothing like it before. Author John Morgan captures the spirit of growing up in the old WCG. Looking at it through his eyes put a lot of things in a fresh light, and as I read through the first chapters I found myself thinking: man, we really were weird!

I was blessed with the rare opportunity to come into the church during an atypically “liberal” period. It lasted a few brief years – an Indian Summer of relative sanity – then was swept away in the “cultural revolution” that saw Garner Ted dumped, Stan Rader facing off against the State of California and Herbert taking a final extended trip into megalomania. I didn't hang around much longer – Christ was using an extremely caustic “spot remover” to tart up his Bride, and the local minister wisely decided I was a definite liability (thanks Jack, you did me a favor!)

I mention that because one's experience of the WCG is determined to some extent by when you were actively involved. John was there long before me, as a kid growing up in the “Truth”, and stayed with the church through till the changes. With a measured style he sets about detailing his story – our story – with great fairness. Warning: if you're anything like me you'll be entering the “flashback zone.” So many things I'd forgotten about. So many fanatical teachings, so much manipulation! Being a part of the church came at a cost. If it wasn't so downright tragic it'd be hilarious.

Unlike some others, John isn't pushing a particular barrow, nor is there any sense of bitterness. It seems he just wants to put it all “on the record”, and he does a magnificent job. No nutty conspiracy theories or cheap apologetics, no strange interpretations of Bible passages, just an amazing story, all the more bizarre for its familiarity. There's also a personal touch to John's account. You can't miss the fact that this church, these doctrines, had an effect on real families, people just like you and me. The personal asides add a great deal to Flying Free.

And oh, those quotes! I'd forgotten just how blatant a lot of Herb's writing was. The thinly veiled threats of eternal damnation if we didn't do this or that. I read them again with a sense of disbelief... was I really taken in by this rubbish?

A full review can be found here, once again based on the first edition. Back then I also commented that it would be wonderful to see it appear in hard copy, and it's great that Flying Free is now available in book form. You can order a copy through lulu.com, either as a $10 download, or in paperback format at $38.95. It is expected by be available on Amazon shortly.

To repeat something I said when the first edition came out - "My advice? Get a copy."